It's My Funeral. . .

So, I’ve been thinking about my funeral – not when it will be, but how it will be.  Specifically, I've been thinking about the physical space (it must be in a church and not a funeral home), the liturgy, and the music.

Many people don’t know I was baptized and confirmed in a Lutheran church. When my family moved to Florida in 1980 and I started working as a church musician, I never had any opportunities to be in a Lutheran setting.  It was when I started working for the Episcopalians that I rediscovered my love for the cycle of the church year and liturgical expressions – but, coming to St. Mark’s was like coming home.  As a result, I sometimes call myself a Lutheran with an Episcopalian aesthetic.

About the space:

I’ve always loved the Episcopal tradition of changing the paraments to white for a funeral, even when that funeral is in Advent or Lent.  I hope the Pastor will think that is okay and that the altar guild won’t object.  I plan to be cremated and request that the front of the church be generously adorned with icons and votive candles. I have a request for flowers: white plumeria.  The plumeria is a flower from my childhood and it always makes me happy to see one. A single lei would be lovely. Individual blossoms amongst the icons and candles would also be nice. (The flowers will have to be ordered from Hawaii or somewhere else.)

Also, my service draws greatly from Evening Prayer so I request that it be held at 6:00 p.m. on a Friday, Saturday, or Sunday evening. 

The stage is set – now what about the music and liturgy?

First, the music:

Please include at least one “big” organ piece. Two of my favorites are Walford Davies’ “Solemn Melody” and G. T. Thalben-Ball’s “Elegy.”  Any Bach Prelude and Fugue or other Bach piece would be appreciated.  Don’t be afraid to play it LOUDLY.
Choral Music Suggestions: “Blessed” by Paul Weber, “God’s Son Has Made Me Free” by Grieg, “God Me in My Head” as set by John Rutter or Andrew Carter, anything readily in the choir’s repertoire that would be suitable.

Other voluntaries should be based on traditional Lutheran hymns – that is hymns with texts by Lutheran composers. Anything from “Orgelbuchlein,” and arrangements by living composers is fine.  Please include at least one Scandinavian hymn – as long as it’s not “How Great Thou Art.”

The last piece should be the choral setting (Oregon Catholic Press, publisher) of the assembly hymn, “Holy Darkness” by Dan Schutte. The refrain should be printed for the assembly to sing. If it can be accompanied by guitar, all the better, but piano is fine, too.  (Some of my colleagues are shaking their heads, but I love this piece and after all, it is MY funeral.)

If the Pastor feels the service will be well attended, it should be advertised that thirty minutes of music will precede the service.  If the Pastor thinks attendance will be minimal, then one big organ piece and “Holy Darkness” will be sufficient music before the service.

Now, for the service itself:

The assembly stands. The Pastor (or an acolyte) carries a large lighted candle to the front.  The following dialogue is sung according to the tone on page 309 (Evening Prayer) in ELW.

At the font:

I am the resurrection and the life Ꞌ saith the Lord;

he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet Ꞌ shall he live;

and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall Ꞌ never die.

From the mid-point of the center aisle:

I know that my Re-Ꞌdeemer liveth,

and that he shall stand at the latter day up-Ꞌon the earth;

and that though this body shall be destroyed, yet shall Ꞌ I see God;

whom I shall see for myself and mine eyes shall behold, and not Ꞌ as a stranger.

From the front of the church:

Blessed are the dead, who die Ꞌ in the Lord;

even so saith the Spirit, for they rest Ꞌ from their labors.

After the candle has been set down, the hymn is sung.

Hymn: The Day You Gave Us, Lord, Is Ended (ELW 569)

A short silence.

O Gracious Light (S 59 in the Hymnal 1982)

This may be sung by a soloist or the choir, unaccompanied.

Prayer of the Day – the first prayer at the top of page 271 in ELW.

Psalm 121

My preference is for a soloist to sing “A Simple Song” from Leonard Bernstein’s “Mass.” If that is not possible, any musical version will do. It can be sung by the choir, or sung by the choir and the assembly.  It should not be simply read.

Old Testament Reading TBD

New Testament Reading TBD

Gospel Acclamation: All Who Believe and Are Baptized (ELW 442)

Gospel Reading TBD

No “sharing” from the assembly. I hope they will do that privately.

Use the hymns I have chosen as the basis for a sermon about the hope of the resurrection.  Note that this service includes portions of the Evening Prayer service as found in ELW and in the Hymnal 1982.  The Pastor may wish to say that I sometimes called myself “a Lutheran with an Episcopalian aesthetic.” That will explain a lot about this service.

Sermon

Hymn of the Day: Abide With Me (ELW 629)

Substitute this text for the last stanza.  It more accurately reflects my own beliefs about what happens when we die.  This stanza was written by me. That should be noted in the bulletin.

Hold, Lord, thy cross before my closing eyes.

Call me by name, and bring me to your side.

When morning breaks, salvation shall I see.

Till then, O Lord, let me abide in thee.

Creed

Prayers of Intercession

Communion

Communion Hymns

O Sacred Head, Now Wounded (ELW 351) If it can be done well, stanza 3 should be sung a capella in four-part harmony.

Lord, Thee I Love With All My Heart (ELW 750) For both hymns, please sing all of the stanzas – even if communion has been served to everybody by the middle of the second stanza of the first hymn.

The rest of the service follows as in ELW.

Sending Hymn: Love Divine, All Loves Excelling (ELW 631)

I’ve done it.  Not only have I written my wishes down, but I’ve put them in cyberspace for everyone to see.  I may change my mind about some of these things as time goes by.  Hopefully, I have plenty of time to make changes!

I don’t know how these things work.  Probably I will have no idea if these wishes are carried out.  If they are, this is my last chance to share my faith.  It will be my chance to say that death is not the end. It is like going to sleep in God’s care and keeping while we wait for the resurrection. 

“Even at the grave we make our song: Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia.”

The top two photos are from Wikipedia.

Update on 1/26/2019
These are the scripture readings I have chosen:
Revelation 7:9-17
1 Thessalonians 4:13-18
Luke 2:25-32